Ugh, I was trying really hard to raise my hand in psych class tonight, but still I couldn’t do it!! I had read the chapter in advance, written out all the notes in advance off of her powerpoint notes that she’d be showing tonight, made flash cards, knew the material really well, and even had about 7 possible questions I could ask on the side of my notes, and STILL I didn’t raise my hand!
Why is this class so hard for me to participate in? Is it because there are more people and a majority of them are older than me? I guess I do feel a little intimated, I think I’m one of very few high schoolers in the class. But I got an A on the last test and she said there were only 5 A’s total in the class, so it’s not like I’m not doing well in her class or what I say isn’t going to be intelligent enough.
It’s just when that class gets going, I get in this comfort zone that’s hard to break out of. It’s easy to hesitate and not act when she pauses. I’m very envious of the people who can just speak aloud what they want to say or ask questions on a regular basis. It seems like my questions aren’t really that necessary for me to ask, because I already know the material so well and don’t really need my questions answered since they’ve just been thought up for the sake of asking a question. And the questions I thought of she often went over so there wasn’t really anything I could say after that.
So maybe I should try not doing my notes, reading, or making the flash cards and see if I can think of more questions when I don’t know the material as well? I don’t know, this is tricky…I was in the right mind set tonight too, feeling confident and like I could do this. But I just couldn’t move my arm and ask what I had prepared. I’m definitely going to keep trying though.
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