The Shyness Project

Not A Great Start

Well yesterday I was supposed to go swing dancing for New Years Day, but the friend I was going to go with who drives us bailed out.  She had mentioned going to the dance the day before, and we had talked about it last week, but on the day we were supposed to go, she didn’t answer any of our emails or calls asking her where she was.  The drive to swing dance is an hour and a half, and she’s always been the one to drive us, so without her my brother and I couldn’t go.  I was hoping that I was going to kick off the New Year by talking to several strangers at the swing dance, but it looks like I’ll have to think of other ways to talk to some people in the meantime.

I went to the library and Ace Hardware today with my brother and dad, hoping to get some conversations in with strangers.  But once again, things didn’t work out as I planned.  I had an armful of books on careers and college majors in my hand, and was waiting in line to be checked out by a librarian.  I was hoping as she was checking out my books, I could start a conversation by saying that I was trying to figure out what careers I might want to go into.  But the line was apparently too long so one of the librarians told us to use the self-checkout.  So grudgingly I sauntered over to the self-checkout, my plan for talking to the librarian ruined.

Then we went to Ace Hardware.  My dad handed me and my brother his Ace card and we headed for the door while he went to check on some lottery thing.  We looked around for Borax, which was something that was supposed to fight off ants my dad had told me.  We looked up and down the pesticide aisle and didn’t see it.  Later my dad joined up with us and he eventually found it, but it was called Boric Acid.

We headed for the check out, and I rehearsed what I could say to the clerk in my head.  I was planning to say something like “We’re having an ant invasion” or something like that to get a conversation going, but once we got to the check out guy, I couldn’t make the words come.  My dad handed him the Boric Acid bottle and the guy just scanned it without looking at what it was, and said the price.  He then just kind of stared at us and looked at us blankly, and I awkwardly stood there ringing my hands, feeling ashamed that I couldn’t say something and break this awkward silence.  But the guy didn’t even look at what we were buying, and it all just seemed so awkward that I couldn’t bring myself to do it.

So I’ve experienced some set backs so far.  But at least I went outside the house today and made an attempt, even though I didn’t do what I had set out to do.  I have a month, there should be other opportunities.  The first couple will be the hardest.

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2 thoughts on “Not A Great Start

  1. Just look at bumps in the road as learning experiences.

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